Cheap Thrills: The little things in life!

Earlier this week, I ran into an Instagram reel that hit me hard. I also discovered that Instagram can be useful for things other than endless models and funny reels. The algorithm picked up on my need for motivation this week. Thanks, Zuckerberg, for not pushing me down that normal route. So, the reel was by one of my all-time favorite movie stars growing up. Will Smith. He was speaking on how people talk about ‘Rock Bottom’ as being the point at which most people are forced to make a change. A standout point of realization. He goes ahead to introduce a different stage in life that I, and I believe a lot of people, hadn’t thought of quite a lot. And maybe it’s because most of us spend most of our lives chasing this point. Unfortunately, or fortunately, depending on how you choose to see it, most of us never get to this point.

Cliff Top.

That is what he calls it. A point in life where you have achieved almost everything in life, you have all the money, power, fame, and anything else that we ordinarily associate with success. And then you realize that, still, life feels somewhat lifeless. That, within all these successes, there is still something missing.

Now, this coming from anyone else might have sounded like a quote from some guy trying to make money out of a motivational book. But coming from a guy who is a Grammy award winner, Oscar award winner, and an Emmy award winner. A guy whose films have grossed over $7.5 billion globally, and we can all agree he has seen it all. That is why when he talks about Cliff Top, I believe he is talking from his own experience. He continues to discuss how, after retrospection, one comes to realize that what they are truly concerned with is how they feel on the inside. Not the joy that comes from owning all the cars or money in the world. But the Joy that comes from within. He talks of the ultimate goal being finding a way of generating this joy without it having to come from material possessions.

Ironically, we have to chase all the money in the world for us to prove to ourselves that we don’t need all that to be genuinely happy. Then look back at all the time we wasted chasing this, and all we can do is try to advise those just getting on to this path to do better. But again, everyone seems to want to learn by themselves. I included. But I think the important thing is to be aware. As we walk this path, not ignore the little things that bring us immense joy and happiness.

The best things in life are free

Happiness lies within us, but sometimes our environment determines whether this happiness stays locked up and eventually gets replaced with gloom or sadness, or it comes out and radiates the environment around us. Friends possess the power to sometimes bring out this happiness, or even the people around us, not necessarily friends. Sometimes a random conversation with a stranger leaves us with this deep satisfaction, and most times than not this is how total strangers end up being friends that we keep.

Yes, it is totally possible, according to me, to genuinely find happiness in your own company. But I feel how much time we can spend by ourselves before solitude comes knocking is debatable. I will dare say that the cheapest way to find genuine happiness is through interaction with others. Whether sharing experiences, hobbies, or even random conversations. But I feel we’ve let social media and tech take away our interactions so much that normal conversations sometimes feel boring, difficult, or awkward. Whenever we are faced with a decision whether to have a conversation or scroll through our phones, it’s easier to do the latter. And if you ask me, a room full of people on their phones is more awkward than any awkward conversation I will ever have. But again, we’ve come to believe the only time we can interact with friends is if we are delegating the responsibility of fun to something else.

What do I mean?

Like for example, the only time you meet up with your friends is over a drink. We are delegating the responsibility of fun to alcohol. Like we all know of drunk friendships. Take away the alcohol, and they can’t have a sober conversation and have fun. So, whenever we can’t afford that drink, we cease to be able to fit in. Nothing is bringing us together. We can’t find the fun.

We used to do walks and picnics. Now we do park and chill. Don’t get me wrong, these are lots of fun. But for instance, we need cars to park and chill. Nowadays, it’s like every outdoor activity we can think of costs money. Think of when your friends tell you…

“Let’s meet up this weekend. It’s been a minute.”

All you can think about is how it will drain your bank account. How fast are we to reply “I am broke” even without having an idea of what the activity will be? We just assume it’s going to cost money. Come to think about it, it’s as if we have let social media define what fun is so much that we can’t come up with ideas ourselves. We’ve seen people brag about how much they spent in bars, without them talking about the overall experience. When out in nature, we are more focused on finding the perfect spot for that perfect picture rather than taking in nature and the experience itself. When at a concert, we are more concerned about capturing the perfect moment for social media rather than savoring the moment.

Saw a post this morning talking about how our Parents used to simply meet up for tea. And they would have the longest, most fulfilling conversations. And it was as simple as that. They were always ready for conversations. They were not that well-connected to the world (social media and all). But they always seemed to have something to talk about.

Nowadays, if you dare to build a community of some sort. Bring people who share experiences, activities, and common beliefs together. If you dare step out of the ordinary. Think of monthly or weekly meetings and events. Sharing and discussions. Develop a somewhat similar way of doing things. Most people will most probably call it a cult. I will dare even touch on religion, coz come to think of it, our need to belong as human beings did not suddenly disappear with social media. In a world where the number of followers or likes you have is taken as a measure of how much you belong. Think of how influencers address hundreds, up to millions of their followers as people they have a connection with, but these are people they’ve never seen or talked to. We honestly all want to belong. We want to be part of something. But we want to do so without feeling like we will be judged or at risk of rejection. So, most churches have welcomed large crowds for the wrong reasons. And some of these rogue posters know what these people need. Scratch that, what these people crave. And if I know what you crave, it’s easy for me to control you. I will tell you exactly what you need to hear. You might even pay for it without knowing.

That’s ordinarily where friendship comes in. A space for you to be free, to be happy, to be listened to. To be helped at the lowest price possible.

After all, what are friends for?

I believe it’s about time we started reading between the lines. Uncomplicate life and bring back the cheap thrills. Friendships without costs. Joy in things that don’t cost much. Finding ways that accommodate most of us. Simple ways for us to coexist, share value, have fun, and experience life in a way that doesn’t take away from us but adds to us. That is the idea behind cheap thrills and finding the joy in the little things in life.